


in the letters you write

by chiasa



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Oneshot, more angst coming, somewhat a harurinralia au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-20
Updated: 2014-10-20
Packaged: 2018-02-21 22:34:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2484737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chiasa/pseuds/chiasa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every month, Haru receives letters from Rin. But the strange thing is, Rin never writes the return address. Haru has a bad feeling about it and decides to confront Rin for once.</p>
            </blockquote>





	in the letters you write

**Author's Note:**

> something i churned up out of nowhere. and i might have a sequel in rin's pov (depending on my shitty schedule).

It's been three years since Haru last saw Rin, and he misses the redhead terribly.

 

He thinks he's still in Australia, but has no proof. And what's even more fishy is that once a month Rin will send him a letter, but without a return address. In those strange messages, Rin tells Haru that he is fine and doing well, his time was improving every day. But these words of assurance never seem to put Haru's unease at rest. Haru doesn't understand.. there was no way he could write letters back to him without having his address. Maybe he just doesn't want to hear from him? No.. no, that couldn't be it. There was something wrong with Rin, Haru could feel it. And one day, Haru made a decision to do something about it.

 

"I'm going to Australia!" Haru announces, slamming his fists on the table in the process.

 

".. Eh?!" The three shrieked simultaneously.

 

Makoto, Nagisa and Rei honestly thought Haru wasn't making any sense. But the look of determination on Haru's face convinced them enough that he was serious. There was nothing that could be said or done to change his mind.

 

"Aren't you content with just the letters, Haru? I know Rin's far away, but I'm sure he's doing fine..." Makoto says gently. Haru was his best friend, and he was definitely concerned about his decision.

 

"The letters are fine, but.. there's something off. I have a bad feeling about Rin. Who knows what could happen there?"

 

"But, Haru-chan... Rin-chan is all grown up. He knows how to take good care of himself, right..?" Nagisa says with a bright smile, though he sounds as though he were trying to convince himself as well.

 

"What Nagisa said is true. Besides, you said it yourself, you have no idea where Rin lives." Rei adjusts his glasses, trying his best to analyze the situation.

 

Haru remained silent as he contemplated their words. They did make some valid points, but.. should he listen to them, or to his own heart..?His blue eyes lit up as he reached his conclusion.

 

"I'm going to Australia no matter what. This time, I'm following what my heart says. And right now, it screams 'Rin'," Haru mutters, fists clenched and eyes gleaming.

 

\--

 

Haru stands impatiently in line, waiting to get through the Australian customs officer. He mumbles a few lines in English over and over again, memorising the greetings Nagisa had taught him and some of the ones he remembers from his last trip. His turn came next and Haru feels insecure all of a sudden. There was no turning back now. But then he remembers the way he felt when he was with Rin on their last trip, and all the sights they saw together.. Haru smiles to himself for a second, feeling comforted. He's going to see Rin again and find out what's wrong.

 

He hands his passport to the officer and tries his best to smile again. It ends up as a grimace instead.

 

"What’s the purpose of your visit?" The firm, scruffy voice of the custom officer surprised Haru momentarily.

 

Feeling intimidated, Haru mutters _sightseeing_ , the exact same thing Rin said in his place three years ago. He remembers faintly how Rin lead him all over Sydney, to the aquatic centre where he found his dream to swim alongside Rin in the olympics. But this time, he has a different plan. Right now he has a mission to find Russell and Lori, Rin’s homestay parents. They should at least know where Rin is staying in Australia. Haru knew that the couple was his best chance of finding Rin. He remembers distinctly taking the bus to their humble home in the suburbs.

 

After a long hour ride from the airport terminal, Haru finally reached his destination. At least he hoped it was. It looked like the same house, but he couldn't be completely sure. He walks to their doorstep nervously, rings the doorbell, and waits. As the seconds tick by, Haru’s heart was pumping faster and faster. He should just back out now, walk away as if he never came to Sydney for Rin. But he had no time to act on his thoughts when a surprised looking Lori opened the door. Haru's nervous feelings are replaced with a slight shame. After all, he came uninvited. But surely they wouldn't mind him asking a few harmless questions?

 

“H-Haru!” she gasps, trying to process what was happening. Haru bows deeply at the woman in front of him. He greets her with a confident _good morning ma’am_ in English and she has no choice but to let him in. “Haru, what are you doing here?”

 

“I’m finding Rin,” Haru tries his best. English just wasn’t his best subject in school, but for Rin he tried to learn the basics. “Do you.. know he stay.. where?” He remains unfazed despite sounding like a stuttering idiot.

 

Lori freezes at the mention of Rin’s name, her eyes widened and lips parted. She clears her throat, snapping out of her initial shock and composes herself before she answered him. “Haruka... the last time we saw Rin was when he came here with you...” she spoke, in a voice that was all too sweet. It was as though she was hiding something from him. Haru knew that she was lying to him.

 

“Truth. Tell me.” He stares sharply into her eyes. It’s rude, Haru thinks briefly, but he’s willing to do anything to see Rin again.

 

Lori bursts into a light, nervous laughter. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Her laughter is soon drowned out by a strangled sob. Lori tries to hold her tears back but ends up choking instead. Haru is bewildered by her sudden change and he lunges forward to comfort her. Oddly enough, he didn’t feel any awkwardness around her.

 

“What’s wrong?” he asks in a cautious tone, albeit worried about the answer he gets.

 

Lori’s sobs got even louder as she clings on to him. “Rin… he..”

  
  
  


Haru bursts out of the house at full speed, running to the bus stop. He missed the bus that was heading to the station.  The next one would only arrive after a good thirty minutes and Haru is in rush. Precious time was ticking. He had to see Rin with his own eyes to believe what Lori said. Why didn't he say anything in the letters?! Haru’s heart was pumping so hard against his chest, he could feel it tightening and restricting in pain. He's out of breath, running hard to nowhere. He just.. he's got to see Rin right now. That's the only thing on his mind. Haru screams in frustration, running fingers through his hair and tugging at the roots.

 

“.. Why..?! Why a-are you doing this to me..?! Why?!” Haru howls, stopping dead in his tracks and sinking to his knees. Salty tears rolled down his cheeks. “R-Rin.. why..?”

 

“Haru?” a male voice called to him. Haru didn’t bother to look up since his face was a mess. “There you are, I was so worried. The moment Lori called me…” the man trails off and Haru can’t be bothered by the relief in his voice. He feels arms wrapping around his body, gently pulling him up and fresh tears flow. It wasn’t the same. Those were the wrong pair of arms, the wrong embrace.

 

“Rin,” Haru whimpers. “Want.. Rin…”

 

“Oh Haru, I’ll bring you to him. I’ll bring you to Rin. It’s okay. He’ll be fine. I swear,” Russell reassures the crying Haru, hugging him tighter. “Rin will be fine.”

 

The drive to the hospital was a grave one. Tension was high and it certainly made Haru uncomfortable. Russell would glance at him and Lori from time to time. As for Lori, she remained silent throughout the trip, occasionally tearing up. She tried to hide her tears away but Haru noticed. He noticed every single thing she did and it pained him to see her that way. As soon as they arrived, Haru rushes out of the car and runs like he never ran before. There were a few nurses who yelled at him to stop sprinting down the ward but Haru ignores them, almost colliding into patients who were walking past. Then he halts in front of a door, panting loudly. All of a sudden Haru is afraid. He is terrified that Rin would push him away and hate him for life.

 

_“Rin doesn’t want you to know anything. He doesn’t want you to worry. And he made the the decision not to meet you until he got better,” Lori pauses, watching Haru’s reaction carefully but Haru remains silent. “The thing is, the doctors don’t even know how long he can last. No one knows if he can get better.”_

 

_“Rin will.. hate me if I see him?” Haru asks innocently._

 

_“Rin can never hate you Haru. Never,” Lori smiles gently. A lone tear rolls down her cheeks and she wipes away before Haru sees it. “He loves you too much.”_

 

Haru takes a deep breath and opens the door slowly. His breath hitches as it slowly reveals a very fragile Rin lying on the bed. The redhead was sleeping soundly, snoring softly. Tears sting his eyes once again and it falls. Haru couldn't stop himself from crying.

 

Rin is so... frail. He looked totally different from the last time Haru saw him. It was merely three years ago that he sent Rin off at the airport. What had gone wrong since then?

 

"Rin," he whispers, gazing at him longingly. The tears are still falling. He reaches out to touch Rin, fingers grazing his face gently, wiping away his tears that fell on him. Haru tucks a few stray strands of hair and leans in for a kiss on the forehead. "I missed you so much," he gasps. It was so surreal. Finally, after three long years did he meet his beloved.

 

He slips his hand and intertwines his fingers gently around Rin's. "Rin, I missed you. Did you miss me too?"

 

Rin's lips curled into a faint smile and he let out a contented sigh. "Haru."

 

Haru was shocked to hear Rin calling him in his dreams. It wasn't just once. His name was like a prayer Rin seemed to repeat over and over again.

  
"When you wake up, I'll kiss you. I'll kiss you so much that you feel suffocated. I'll kiss you to make up for the time we lost. I'll kiss you till the last second you are alive. I love you, Rin," Haru's eyes burned with passion. Such strong love he had for Rin. And he was willing to wait till the day Rin decides to wake up from his nightmare.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to my beta/friend, spookyhazukis, for dealing with my shit lately and editing my work. much love. also, thank you in advance for reading this fic. i have a thing for angst and i am terribly sorry for hurting your precious hearts. new chapter of soumako will be up probably next week to those who are waiting.


End file.
